At first I thought it was the mornings that were the worst. Then it was the evenings, but it turns out, it doesn’t matter what time of day it is, it’s realizing Edie isn’t around anymore that’s so hard.
I’m just having a difficult time coming to grips with that fact. We were together nearly 40 years, and then suddenly she’s gone. How can someone be here one minute, and then be gone the next? Even knowing it was coming for awhile, I still wasn’t prepared.
It’s just all way too final, and I’m not coping well. I haven’t been eating well. I’ve been losing weight I can’t afford to lose, and on top of that, two weeks ago, I got a case of the shingles (or so they say), which has taken a particular toll on me physically, including the loss of more weight.
I’m even beginning to understand how some individuals can so easily become victims of unscrupulous people, praying on their moment of vulnerability, and a desire to believe there is a life after death.
I don’t know anymore, maybe a glass of wine [or 2] will help.